can i have a dollar?!

So, so tired lately. I've had a haaaard time making myself get up every morning for the last week. Ugh.

All I wanna do is grade papers in bed and cut yarn for weaving projects. That's all. But there's always something to do, someone to see, an errand to run, a school function. It's good. I like staying busy. But I'm worn out.

I made dinner for my parents and Mama last night. Mama likes tofu. Hahaha.

I refuse to leave my house tonight.

I was told this morning at carpool that I clearly have an affinity for the bad/weird/crazy kids. I do. I love them. For the same reason I prefer South County to North County. They have way more personality. And they appreciate any ounce of care, time, positive attention given them significantly more than any model student.

Crazy text messages from my crazy ex boyfriend two nights in a row.

Fourth grade, now.

"i wish you knew how strongly i feel about our friendship."

Got my thigh colored Tuesday night. Huuuurt. But I love it. My shitty phone doesn't really do the color justice; the feathers are royal blue and each eye is mint green with purple and gold rings. Scott Barbier is a badass.

Here's the nurse/maternal grandmother Jason Kelly did a couple weeks ago:


I want more. Always.

Putting together appications, portfolio for grad school.

I'm exhausted.

i'm getting tattooed tonight.

Done.
Done.
Done.
Done.
Done. Done. DONE.

worst move.

You just pushed the one, wrong button. The only one.

Don't ever fucking talk to me again. Don't hug me. Don't suck up to me at shows. Don't comment on my Facebook statuses--especially the ones that have nothing to do with you. Do not.

You're brainless and spineless. And while other people might be willing to reconcile with you after you cross them for (someone else's) approval, I'm definitely not. At all. You just burned a bridge that can't be rebuilt.

I LOVE MY MOM!!!!

Mical

Hey baby

7:47pm Kelly

Hi, Mooommm.

Guess who I just talked to on FB chat?!

7:47pm Mical

We just got back from dinner and coffee. WHO?

Klint?

7:48pm Kelly

How was it?? Delicious?!

Nahh. We were texting earlier. John Mark Sico III!

7:48pm Mical

It was OK. Dad picked all the right stiff. Me, not so much.

Cool!

7:49pm Kelly

Hahaha. What'd you get? Lamb brains?

7:49pm Mical

LOL. NO, not that bad.

Bye. Nore snow tomorrow?

I meant More.

7:50pm Kelly

Bye??

Where the hell are you going?

Is there more snow coming, really??

7:50pm Mical

No where. I didn't think you like to FB chat. Lame.

7:51pm Kelly

Hahahaha. It's fine. I don't mind it. I'm just sittin' here.

7:51pm Mical

Watch the news ever?

7:51pm Kelly

HAHAHAHA!! NOOOO. You know that.

7:52pm Kelly

What're they saying?

7:52pm Mical

Love you baby. I'm going to get out of these dress-up clothes and get comfortable. Love oyu.

Snow atarting at 3 Am

I can't type. Too much wine.

7:53pm Kelly

Mkaaayy. Love you, too! Tell Dad I love him.

HAHAHAHAHA!

This is the best FB chat I've ever had in my life!

four day weekend!

Yesterday was actually relatively productive, despite the snowfall. Went grocery shopping. Got lunch. Ran errands with Chris. And started another drawing:

She needs some work--I did not intend for her to look like Princess Leia and the skull is too big--but I'm really happy with her features.

Sorting through clothes, straightening my room, and cleaning the bathroom today. I've been good about keeping house lately; it feels really good. Also, I'm expecting a roommate in the next couple of weeks. Excited. Not to mention, I'll be saving $500+ on rent and bills every month now.

A date for Sunday, maybe? Weird. Unplanned. I genuinely don't give a fuck about Valentine's, but it might be fun.

. . .

So, the kid whose brothers were shot? I walked into the office and saw him sitting at the big conference table. He turned his head to say hey and the side of his face is swollen. He has one of the worst black eyes I've ever seen--on a grown man, let alone a little kid.

I got a whoopin'.

Un. Fucking. Believable.

vlog.

I probably shouldn't have watched this first thing in the morning. It's a vlog from our Superintendent. A little frightening when a budget update is so dire, your boss feels the need to address all 11,000+ full-time employees in a decidedly personal manner.

"We have weathered over $100,000,000 (yes, that's one hundred million) in cuts to our budget in the past two years." Really? REALLY? Fuck Sonny Purdue. He protects $19,000,000 in funding for the fucking Go Fish program but cuts Education in a state with the, "highest dropout rate for it's population at 22.1 percent," and an achievement gap that is expanding exponentially and indefinitely--when it should be closing fast. It's goddamn 2010.

Akjncfiuwerng.

Saves The Day and New Found Glory last night. Disappointing, I guess. I love both of those bands so much, but there were too many people at the worst venue getting drunk and push moshing me. Ugh. I wish I'd seen the same show at Under The Couch a million years ago. It would've been completely different. So much better.

Finshed six--count 'em, SIX--lesson plans yesterday. I am pleased with all of them. It's kind of nice waking up with nothing pressing to do. Haha.

Going to Mom and Dad's for the Super Bowl tonight. Don't care about the game. Just want to hang out with my fambly.

drawing.

I actually like this one. Haha.

Glad tomorrow is Friday.

"it's stream of consciousness."

My new ones:

LOVE them both. Scott did such a good job on my thigh; going back for color in a couple weeks. And every time I get something new by Jason Kelly, it immediately becomes my favorite. Better and better. These are each tied for first, I think, though.

I had a really terrible night Monday. In a matter of minutes I found out that I am not getting a tax return this year and was forced to pay $120+ for a prescription that 1. I've been on for years and 2. has never cost more than $30.00. I elected the same health care plan from the same insurance company that I had last year. Exactly the same.

Last night, however, was a better one. Visited Jill at the new place--it's ah-mazing--and marvelled at her knick knack collection for a while. I need to go thrifting soon. Then dinner with Rachel, who punched me in both of my tattoos. She held my hand in the car, though, so I forgave her. She also wrote me a poem? I have yet to read this poem.

New painting from Eddie S. Puzzled over where to put/hang it for at least half-an-hour. I owe him and Jill artwork now.

Just had lunch. Waiting for one of my CSTs to come around. And for fourth grade to start.

Feel like I'm forgetting something.

"i know. let's fuggum."

Also, I would like a boy who:

• draws me pictures;
• makes me laugh;
• is a good conversationalist;
• is awesome in bed.

I mean, really. That's it. That's all. Fuck a job; I've got one. Not tryin' to get married anytime soon. And if you're not funny, I got nothin' for ya.

Anyway. I love Rachel Gruber. Goddamnit. Madly in love.

19 October 2009

I think you're two-faced and impressionable and I'm not sure I want to be your friend anymore.

Posted by Terminal Cases at 8:01:00 PM on 19 October 2009

Almost six months later and I'm thinking the same shit about the same person right now. Add to it a grevious spike in distrust, and you've got a recipe for the abrupt end of a 'friendship'.

Cleaning house lately. I think, in part, as some kind of backwards, productive procrastination thing to keep from having to write lesson plans and deal with my classroom.

I need to get out of here. I want to go somewhere for the long weekend coming up. Ugh.

I'm going deaf.